Category: Psychotherapy (Page 1 of 2)

Positivity Gone Toxic

Toxic positivity is exactly that – being positive to the point of being toxic. It is positivity in excess. Toxic positivity is dismissive and invalidating. Toxic positive says there is no room for anything but feeling good. Toxic positivity denies the organic, human emotional experience that is expansive and ever-changing. To deny our feelings is to be inauthentic. Even the most zen of human beings are going to have a moment of anger or frustration because guess what? There are simply some experiences that are going to generate feelings of anger or frustration. It doesn’t mean the zen master will forever stay angry or frustrated or that they are flawed for feeling such. It simply is the human emotional experience in action.

Toxic positivity tells you that your emotions are wrong and should not be felt. This can create feelings of guilt and shame for simply feeling what you feel. And now you’re probably going to just keep that to yourself going forward, try to ignore it, and never really spend enough time with those feelings to process the experience. Healing cannot occur when feelings are shoved aside and ignored. This actually creates more emotional distress because, in your avoidance, you have actually doubled your pain. You have the original pain of feeling what you feel, and now – because of guilt, shame, and suppressing the feelings – you also have the pain of feeling bad for feeling it in the first place. Yuck!

When you stifle your feelings and pretend they do not exist, you are not able to hold space for them, identify them, understand them, etc. This disables your opportunity to self-regulate within your emotions. We have a vast list of emotional feeling words for a reason. It is healthy to turn inward, identify the emotion that is present, and label it for what it is (e.g. overwhelmed, sad, disappointed, etc.) to help yourself learn to regulate. Emotion regulation is the healthy coping strategy that helps to keep you from scoffing at your boss, clapping back at your friend, or snarling at your partner.

Additionally, when we’re subjecting others to the “positive vibes only” mentality, we may end up becoming a bit ostracized and isolated. Toxic positivity damages relationships because the message you’re sending to others is that they cannot feel what they feel and cannot be themselves when they’re around you. During stressful events, such as the COVID-19 pandemic, toxic positivity can become incredibly harmful. Recognizing that everyone’s pandemic experience is varied, to dismiss the experiences of those who are experiencing it differently than you or just not in an upbeat perpetual Positive Polly perspective is sending the message to them that there’s something wrong with them for having a hard time. This pandemic has been especially isolating and telling someone they shouldn’t feel what they feel about it could create an even greater isolating effect. We need various forms of creative connectivity and communication now more than ever.

I know it sounds cliche, but the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself, and it is critical that you authentically show up as yourself – whatever you may be feeling in any given moment. It’s okay to feel the negative stuff because it’s real. And there’s increased knowing of the self and opportunity for growth and change when we get real. Learning to check in with yourself more in an honest way can be really helpful. Get a list of emotion or feeling words and keep it accessible. Pause and check in with yourself to see what’s coming up for you. I share an emotions/feelings wheel with my Instagram followers (@fulfillmentcounseling) every Friday because I believe it to be such a critical piece in our wellness.

When others are sharing how they feel with you, know that this is their experience. It doesn’t have to be how you would feel, and you don’t even have to agree with how someone is feeling in order to be helpful. Validating someone’s experience isn’t saying I feel the same way or that I agree. Through validation, I’m simply acknowledging that your experience is real to you. In action, this may sound like, “I can see that this is upsetting for you,” or “I’m so sorry you’re having such a tough time right now.”

Being able to see the clouds with silver-lining in stressful situations is a skill. Being able to simultaneously hold space for the dark, heavy clouds that surround and drench you is also a skill.

Get out of the Victim Mindset in 4 Steps

Not a lot of things are 100% true, but here are two known facts: 1) Life is not fair, and 2) People do not act right. Undoubtedly, there are going to be times in life where we feel immensely disappointed by the cards we are dealt and/or by those around us. Disappointment WILL happen. We WILL be let down in life. Sometimes we might feel and experience this overwhelmingly – perhaps, what feels like over and over again, and in turn, we begin to focus heartily upon these events. We cannot see the forest for the trees, and we begin to believe all life has to offer us is frustrating experiences and people who are out to harm us. In these instances, we have opportunity to respond. Unfortunately, sometimes in these instances our response is to take on the role of victim and adopt a victim mindset.

A state of victimhood feels like helplessness, hopelessness, and powerlessness. Everything is doom and gloom. We believe it. We manifest it. We make it true. We say, “Look at what you did to me!” We blame others for situations and outcomes. We blame others for how we feel. We blame others for how we behave.

Why might we do this? It’s simple. There’s a payoff. When we take on the role of victim, we no longer have to take responsibility. If it’s not our fault, we don’t have to change. Why? Because someone ELSE needs to change! We garner attention from those around us during our pity parties and find comfort in this familiar place. We are often rewarded with concern that provides us a sense of justification, validation, and power. Some people emotionally tend to us when we’re in this state of existence, and that feels good when we’re down!

Despite these payoffs, there are also costs involved. What is the role of victimhood costing us? The costs of victimhood are heavy. It can lead to depression and even suicide. It can involve allowing ourselves to become stuck and no longer taking risks to move forward in life. We might become co-dependent and avoid getting better. We are no longer empowering ourselves! And while we might find people initially come and tend to us, offering compassion, when we routinely take on the role of victim, people eventually begin avoiding us. In their eyes, we’ve become the Debbie Downer… the Bitter Bob. Most people can only tolerate this type of company for so long. Then guess what happens? As people depart from us, it only serves to reinforce the ‘woe is me’ feeling and victim role: “Everyone leaves me!”

Within our life experiences, we develop an interpretation. This is our, often internalized, story we make up in our heads about what has happened, why it happened, etc. We begin to view our experiences through these filters. Unfortunately, these filters are often not objective and factual. Remember, it’s our interpretation! It takes a level of consciousness to first recognize when this is happening, and then to not attach ourselves to the story. How do we know when this is happening? An example would be when we respond with a knee-jerk reaction to a situation or person. That knee-jerk reaction is us responding based upon all our life events we’ve been through up until that moment. Is our knee-jerk reaction to victimize ourselves and look for blame elsewhere?

If you find yourself relating to this blog post, it might be time to get honest with yourself. Is this you? Now what?! Consider these 4 steps:

Recognize the payoff and cost. What are YOUR payoffs? It can vary from person to person. How is this role serving you? What do you get to avoid by taking on this role? Also, what are the negative consequences? What is it costing you? Healthy relationships? Advancing in your career? Going to that support group?
Live a life of consciousness. When you’re feeling triggered by something and finding yourself feeling like a victim, ask yourself some questions. What am I thinking about this situation or person? Is it completely accurate? Is it absolute fact? Remember, it is our interpretation, or thoughts, that lead to our feeling – not the person or situation, itself! Do not internalize!
Count your blessings daily. It is incredibly hard to remain within a victim mindset when you are focusing on your blessings. What is going right or well for you? Create a daily gratitude list where you identify three things that are good or positive. Some examples: I have a cozy home; I got the kids to school on time today; I have a job; I opted for the healthier choice at lunchtime; My car started; My neighbor greeted me. Need help getting started? Try the free app: Secret of Happiness.
Accept that life is not fair, and people do not act right. Be flexible. Don’t expect perfection. Learn to forgive. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Know that people will show you who they are, and when they do… accept it! (Do not confuse acceptance with tolerance 😊). Try this mantra on for size: “He/She is showing me who they are, and I accept it and know it has nothing to do with me.”

Regards,
Dana

Lifestyle Medicine in 5 Daily Doses

Lifestyle medicine is not intended to replace traditional medicine, but it represents a concept about how we live that is intended to be of best benefit to our minds and bodies. Most of us aim to be healthy in one way or another, and lifestyle medicine brings to focus some specific aspects about the way we live that are indicated to help propel us to existing at our very best, both physically and mentally. These recommended five basic daily lifestyle patterns are heavily backed by research, as well.

Dose 1: Eliminate tobacco, street drugs, and/or misuse of prescription medications.
Dose 2: Consume a predominantly Mediterranean diet; eliminate GMO.
Dose 3: Be physically active – at least 30 minutes a day.
Dose 4: Learn new things; exercise your mind in different ways.
Dose 5: Maintain a healthy and supportive social network (face to face interactions are best!).

Evidence suggests it takes, on the average, around 45 days to establish a new habit. This means, for many of us, days 1 through 44 are spent very consciously making the choice to do or not do something until eventually it becomes second nature or habit. So maybe you are already on board with some of the recommended dosages above, but there are some that are going to require active effort. Know that if you dedicate and commit yourself to making things happen daily, it will eventually become a habit that is ingrained. You will reap the benefits and want to keep going!

Something else to keep in mind… we are more likely to achieve changes that we speak into the universe. Speak your desired changes aloud. Tell people of your goals and intended outcomes. Develop and meditate upon a vision board that depicts your desired changes. Engage in positive self-talk. Tell yourself you CAN achieve the things you desire. Change your thoughts, and you change your life!

Regards,
Dana

Choline… huh?

Choline. Ever heard of it? Me neither. Until recently. As a result of what I’ve learned, I’d like to share with you.

Choline – apparently – is a nutrient deemed essential for brain development. Who knew? And not only brain development but also cognitive functioning, memory, muscle function, and so much more; something so essential and yet… only 6.6.% of American adults consume an adequate amount, according to a National Health & Nutrition Examination Survey. The U.S. Food & Drug Administration suggests we get in 550 mg of choline a day. Being deficient in choline can lead to conditions such as “fatty liver, atherosclerosis, and neurological disorders;” can also leave individuals experiencing “low energy level, memory loss, cognitive decline, muscle aches, and mood changes or disorders” per a recent Psychology Today article (Feb 2017). Thinking of having children? For men, lack of choline can actually impact not only the structure of sperm, but also energy and mobility of such. Additionally, for mothers-to-be, deficiency of choline during pregnancy can stunt the developing brain of the fetus.

Now that we know what it is, what it does, and the hazards of not getting enough… let’s problem-solve. Where can we get choline? The biggest sources of choline derive from some of our feathered friends – turkey and chicken. Eggs are also a top source. Choline doesn’t discriminate against the sea though; salmon is also a good place to get it. Not to worry if you’re vegan, or maybe your taste buds just don’t care for the aforementioned foods, because you can also find it in cauliflower and brussel sprouts, in addition to purchasing choline in a supplement form quite affordably.

#themoreyouknow #foryourhealth #mindbodyspirit

Regards,
Dana

<Disclaimer: Content of this blog is for information purposes only and not intended as therapy or medical advice>

Getting Fulfilled in Your Relationship

Within the context of intimate relationships, couples tend to turn to one another for fulfillment. While needs can also be met independently from within, via employment settings, through friends, family, etc., when in a partnership, couples tend to turn inward and place these needs and expectations upon one another primarily. There are a multitude of needs, and these can vary from person to person. However, the top 10 general needs tend to be as follows:

Honesty and openness – having someone in your life with whom you can express yourself while they are receptive and truthful with you in feedback, even if it challenges you.
Recreation & leisure companionship – having someone who enjoys getting out of the house with you, engaging in common hobbies and sources of fun and relaxation.
Affection – having someone who provides you with physical touch and contact, not necessarily sexual.
Sexual fulfillment – having someone who addresses the physical intimacy and sexual needs you have.
Physical attractiveness – having a partner who finds you attractive and desires you.
Conversation – having someone with whom you can share about your day, as well as deepest thoughts.
Admiration – having someone who values and appreciates who you are, your accomplishments, etc.
Family commitment – having someone who integrates their own family with you and creates an environment supportive of developing and growing your own family together.
Household help – having someone who shares the responsibilities with you in running a household and creating a sense of home.
Financial support – having someone who contributes to collective financial goals and provides support in the day to day monetary obligations.

At varying times, how the above list is prioritized for each individual in a relationship will change. What one finds most critical in the beginning of a relationship might move further down the list as time goes by, and this is to be expected as a relationship evolves. Regardless of how one prioritizes, it is most relevant to ensure that those in the relationship know what their partner is needing or seeking most as time passes. Communicating this allows for one’s partner to know where to focus their energies.

As you look over the list, think about your current relationship. While all 10 may feel very important, what if you had to prioritize? Narrow it down to a top three that you find to be of the greatest need for you right now in this moment. Why do you need these particular three? How would having these three emotional needs fulfilled benefit you? Benefit your relationship?

With your partner, sit down with this list. Each of you identify your top three emotional needs and communicate why you’ve chosen these three. Next, give thought to at least 3 ways you and your partner can attempt to meet or address these identified needs over the next week. Communicate these ideas with one another and come to an agreement. Commit only to things you know you will do, but don’t be afraid of change and trying something new. Give this a go for the next week!

Regards,
Dana

<Disclaimer: Content of this blog is for information purposes only and not intended as therapy or medical advice>

You Snooze, You… Gain! Ten Steps for Improved Sleep

One of the biggest struggles I see with clients is the challenge of getting a good night’s rest. Now, don’t get me wrong, most people that come to me aren’t presenting with lack of sleep as their chief complaint. However, what we often uncover is that their high stress levels, anxiety, etc. are partially attributed by poor sleep patterns. Good, quality rest is essential for optimum functioning.

For the vast majority of us, we require a solid 8 hours of sleep. Some individuals may require less, while others may require more. Thus, it is important for you to know your body and what it needs in order to work toward meeting the need. As a general rule of thumb, if you find yourself feeling tired when you awaken and/ or wanting a nap in the day, you’re likely not getting enough rest. Time to make some adjustments!

Sadly, in our very busy and hectic lives, society views sleep as something that we can sacrifice. Big test tomorrow? Bypass sleep and study. Deadline at work? Stay up late fueled by coffee and do what’s necessary. One sleep-deprived night can leave you feeling irritable and tired, but doing this repetitiously can become harmful to your health. Your day to day activities can begin to suffer as well. Missing out on sleep results in poor concentration and focus, leading to increased mental mistakes.

How do we address it?

Side-sleeping. Try a body pillow to support this position.
Essential oils. Therapeutic grade quality oils are recommended (e.g. DoTerra). Lavender is a gem – diffused or spritzed on your bedding. You can even use it in a rollerball application on your neck, wrists, etc.
Cool temps. Our body temperature naturally drops before slumber, so keeping your room more chilled allows your body to do less work. Research tells us that keeping your temperature between 60 and 67 degrees Fahrenheit is best for sleep. Also, avoid evening workouts because this also raises your core body temp for up to 6 hours.
Routine. Arise the same time daily, regardless of what you have planned. Ideally, this time would be 16 hours prior to bedtime because your body’s circadian rhythm does its own thing throughout the day prepping you for sleep and this is generally when your body naturally wants to bed down. So set your alarm and leave it there! You also might consider setting your coffee maker to start brewing at your wake-up time, if you find the smell of a fresh brew refreshing.
Ritual. Have a consistent, wind-down ritual that signals it is nearing bedtime for your mind and body. This might be a warm bath, listening to relaxing music, or reading the next chapter in your book.
Meditation. Studies show that meditating anywhere between 5 to 20 minutes a day can induce sleep. If you’re newer to meditation practices, there are meditation apps that can be downloaded to your phone. Personally, I like Buddhist Meditation Trainer. There are also free guided meditation podcasts. Try UCLA Health Mindful Awareness Research Center (www.marc.ucla.edu). Integrate meditation into your nightly routine just before bed.
OTC options. Valerian root is helpful for many. Between 400-900 mg approximately 2 hours before bed is a typical dosage recommendation for insomnia. Melatonin is also a good sleep aid to be used in brief intervals. Your body naturally produces the hormone melatonin, which tells your body it is time for sleep. Taken as a supplement, 1-6 mg is the generally recommended range, and you would take this about an hour before bed. Less is best with melatonin, as too much can cause headaches, nausea, or dizziness, so start with 1 mg to see how you feel. As always, let your healthcare providers know when you’re taking anything over the counter.
Be mindful of what you eat. Don’t go to bed on a full stomach or hungry. There are some foods known to support sleep, which would be good ideas for evening snacks. Bananas contain tryptophan, which is associated with quality sleep. They also contain magnesium and potassium, which relax muscles. Milk also contains tryptophan. Other tryptophan containing foods include cheddar cheese, peanut butter, hummus, and pumpkin seeds. Melatonin-containing foods, such as pineapple and cherries are also good options.
Avoid alcohol and caffeine several hours before bed; avoid nicotine near bedtime, as well. Avoid electronics right before bed too. Screen time stimulates the brain.
Avoid checking the time. This generally increases anxiety. You start to fret over how long you’ve been awake, how much time you have left before the alarm, etc. It serves you no purpose.

Regards,
Dana

<Disclaimer: Content of this blog is for information purposes only and not intended as therapy or medical advice>

Getting to Know The Narcissist

With absolute certainty, at some point you may have said or heard someone else say, “he’s such a narcissist,” or “she’s so narcissistic.” In the field of psychology, there is such a thing as narcissistic personality disorder, which is diagnosed upon meeting several distinct criteria.

The key diagnostic features are as follows:

“has a grandiose sense of self-importance;
is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love;
believes that he or she is ‘special’ and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people;
requires excessive admiration;
has a sense of entitlement;
is interpersonally exploitive;
lacks empathy; is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others;
is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her;
shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.” (American Psychiatric Association, 2013, p. 669-670).

Most people involved in relationships with individuals with narcissistic personality disorder will often describe the interaction much like walking on eggshells. In order to imagine this type of individual, there are some movies that depict characters with this type of personality; think Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada. Other examples include Christian Bale in American Psycho, Ben Stiller in Zoolander, Vivien Leigh in Gone With the Wind, and Michelle Pfeiffer in White Oleander.

There are some very typical interactions one would very likely experience if involved with someone with narcissistic personality disorder. One of these types of interactions is known as Love Bombing. Used as a method of luring their victims, this plays out like very romantic gestures or words, intense flattery, and constant displays of affection. This tends to inflate the victim’s confidence and drives his/her desire to have this continued level of affection and attention. While the victim is believing all these grand gestures are about him or her, the reality is these techniques are used by the narcissist to inflate his or her own sense of admiration and self-esteem. Mirroring is another strategy used by individuals with narcissistic personality disorder. Narcissists will put forth effort to have their victims perceive they are just like them and the two have a great deal in common. Victims often feel they have found their soulmates. Through this envy-inspired mirroring, victims lose their sense of uniqueness and self-esteem is lowered over time. Narcissists are also well-versed in the silent treatment. In addition, they often project their own undesirable beliefs or perceptions of themselves onto their victims. Another common strategy, known as Gaslighting, involves use of psychological abuse where the narcissist will present inaccurate information to the victim in order to have them question or doubt themselves, their memory or perception, and sometimes even sanity.

Any of this sound familiar or resonate with you? If you find yourself really identifying with the characteristics and behaviors detailed above, you will also probably recognize instability in your interpersonal relationships and a fair amount of dissatisfaction. If you desire to learn more about yourself, what motivates your behaviors, and possibly consider change, I would suggest talking to a professional; find a therapist, such as myself, who is confident with personality disorders. If you find yourself on the other end of the spectrum, believing you may be a victim, there is equally help for you. I would also suggest you reach out to a therapist and also one who is well-trained in working with personality disorders. In the meantime, please see the listing below for some helpful resources for victims, but do not solely resort to trying to resolve this on your own. It can be immensely helpful to get support and help through this detachment and healing process.

Helpful website:

Out of the Fog: Information for those with a family member or loved with who suffers from a personality disorder.

Helpful readings:

Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed by Wendy T. Behary
Narcissism: Surviving the Self-Involved – A Little Primer on Narcissism and Self-Care by Meredith Resnick
How to Survive Loving a Narcissist by Dr. Andrew M. Goodman
Why is it Always About You?: The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism by Sandy Hotchkiss
Narcissism: Enter the Mind of a Narcissist! by Clarence T. Rivers
Who’s Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life by Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D.

References

American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders: DSM-5. Washington, D.C.: American Psychiatric Association.

Regards,
Dana

Challenge Depression by Nurturing Yourself

For those who live with depression, it can be difficult and at times even feel impossible to function. You know the dark, down days will come, and when they hit, the weight is like a ton of bricks. It can become incredibly hard to think and concentrate. Your appetite may leave you. Your sleep patterns may go awry. Your energy likely subsides and your motivation disappears. Feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and/or worthlessness abound.

When you’re amidst this state, it is hard to recall the good days. But they were there. Nurture yourself during these times. Feed your soul with the things you enjoy. Maybe that’s watching movies, listening to music, going for a walk, wrapping up in a soft blanket, eating chocolate, soaking in a warm bath… You decide. It helps, when you’re not in a depressed state, to make a list of these very things: your go-to coping skills. You’ll thank yourself later. Be compassionate with yourself, and know this will pass. It is a process. Give yourself permission to feel whatever you feel.

Keep a notebook that is full of things that inspire you: poems, encouraging quotes, pictures, etc., and reflect upon it. Have a supporter you can trust and depend upon to call in times of need; someone who is willing to even just be present with you. Pick someone positive and uplifting. Have pre-made freezer meals on hand for the days you lack the motivation to tend to cooking for yourself. Engage in a healthy daily practice of activities when you ARE feeling well, so these things remain habit when you’re feeling depressed. Maybe it’s daily yoga, walking, juicing, reading, meditation, prayer, or aromatherapy. If you’re not doing good and healthy things for yourself when you’re feeling well, you most assuredly won’t be doing them when you’re feeling depressed.

None of the aforementioned supportive tactics will take away the depressed mood entirely, but they can alleviate some of the depressive symptoms, even if just briefly. Think of the depression like a weight you carry. Even if only setting aside the weight briefly, you’ll still experience some relief. And every little bit helps.

If you are not already under the care of a physician and/or therapist for the treatment of your depression, I encourage you to take that step. Your mental health is just as valuable as your physical health.

Regards,
Dana

<Disclaimer: Content of this blog is for information purposes only and not intended as therapy or medical advice>

Aromatherapy – What’s all the Hype!?

Lots of information can be found these days pertaining to the use of essential oils, via aromatherapy, as a means of addressing mood. So what exactly is aromatherapy? Aromatherapy is the use of oils from natural sources, such as plants, trees, flowers and herbs, therapeutically for the benefit of emotional, physical, and spiritual wellness. Most studies speak to a benefit when used as a supplement to other forms of treatment, and do not suggest aromatherapy, alone, as a method for treatment or cure. In other words, aromatherapy is best indicated as a complementary therapy to other evidence-based practices.

You might be wondering how this process works. Through the inhalation process, essential oils can message the olfactory system and cause the brain to activate neurotransmitters – dopamine and serotonin. As you probably are aware, dopamine and serotonin play a major role in regulating mood. In addition, the inhalation process can impact cognition. It is important to note, however, that every individual is different and his/her perceived benefit from the use of essential oils will vary. Presently, I have a number of patients within my practice setting that indicate benefit from use of essential oils via aromatherapy on their own. Additionally, I diffuse them within my office daily, carefully selecting which oils to diffuse based upon who I will be seeing during the course my day.

So now that we’ve discussed the practice of aromatherapy and how it works, let’s look at some essential oils commonly used to influence mood. While it does not directly impact mood, one essential oil I commonly diffuse is tea tree. The reason being is that tea tree is known to be an immune system booster, and I think we can all agree that when we feel better physically, we tend to feel better emotionally. I consider it a staple, as far as essential oils go. Rosemary is another great one, as it yields multiple benefits. It is known to stimulate the brain, enhancing memory and focus. Additionally, it is indicated to have antidepressant properties. Peppermint and lemon are also indicated to enhance and sharpen focus.

Patchouli is another one I keep on hand regularly, as it is known to have good effect with anxiety and depression. In addition to its mood-lifting properties, it is also indicated to be good for fatigue. LIkewise, marjoram is also indicated for depression, anxiety, and fatigue. Bergamot, similarly, is also known for benefits with the same symptoms and has a nice citrus scent. Cedarwood is yet another essential oil known for its calming properties, and tends to have good effect with reducing feelings of anxiety and stress. In addition, lavender, jasmine and chamomile are also known for having a calming effect that reduces stress and anxiety.

The aforementioned suggestions are not intended to be an all-encompassing listing, by no means. If your interest has been peaked, take the extra step to look into aromatherapy further and find some essential oils that work for you. There are a number of resources available to provide you with additional information, and I would recommend brand-neutral books and articles to get you going. Aromatherapy is a practice, regardless of what brand of essential oils you use, and I would suggest finding information that is not endorsing of a particular brand to get started. Then you can do your brand-specific research to determine from where you want to purchase your essential oils.

Regards,
Dana

<Disclaimer: Content of this blog is for information purposes only and not intended as therapy or medical advice>

Chronic Pain & Depression

An extremely common issue I’m faced with in the treatment setting is depression, coupled with chronic pain. In my field, we reference these individuals as the co-morbid, meaning there are two or more illnesses occurring within an individual at the same time. This is important to note because often times, treating the issues simultaneously yields better results. For example, take the individual who is depressed and suffering with chronic pain. Pain IS depressing. How can I look at one without the other and be effective? Well… I can’t.

Millions of Americans suffer with some sort of chronic pain. Chronic pain, whether mild or severe, impacts a person daily in varying degrees. Daily. Imagine waking up every day in physical pain or discomfort. Maybe you don’t have to imagine because you’re already there. The number of people suffering with chronic pain is staggering.

When we look at pain and its role within the body, it is important to understand that the sensation of pain, itself, is not a bad thing. Pain is your body giving your brain a signal intended to protect you. Pain is telling you something is wrong that needs to be addressed. How does this work in a “normal,” healthy setting? You’re walking a trail and slip and twist your ankle. You feel a painful sensation in your ankle. You elect to prop it, ice it, take it easy, etc. You treat the injury, and as it heals the pain subsides. Case closed.

With chronic pain issues, however, something within your central nervous system has gone wrong. The central nervous system continues to send pain signals to the brain even after the injury or problem has healed and resolved. So maybe you did all the propping, icing, and taking it easy… and your doctor even tells you it’s healed and all is well. But you’re still in pain.

We cannot predict who will fall into the chronic pain versus the acute pain category, but some studies have identified some commonalities. For example, women are more likely to experience chronic pain than men. In addition, a history of surgery can increase the likelihood of chronic pain because trauma is being introduced to the body. Further, those with severe depression may find themselves more at risk – and vice versa. Did you know that some of the same areas of the brain that are activated to process emotional pain are also the same areas activated to process physical pain? Thus, if my central nervous system is improperly signaling that particular region of my brain, there is a likelihood that I will be become susceptible to both chronic pain and depression.

Knowing the lay of the land, so to speak, helps with considering treatment options and what may be of best help when suffering with chronic pain and depression. First and foremost, don’t ignore your body’s message. Pain, left untreated, can cause the central nervous system to become hypersensitive – which can propel you down into the rabbit hole of chronic pain. Consulting with your primary care physician is vital. If you’re also experiencing depression, consult a mental health professional as well. Even if neither provider requests such access, it is important for you to sign any releases necessary so the two providers can consult. Share what you know with both providers, as well, to keep both abreast to what the other is doing related to your care. Continuity of care is the best medicine above all.

You may be wondering what to expect from your providers. Medications specifically for pain are an option, but also some anti-seizure and anti-depressant medications can help because if you remember, physical pain and emotional pain are processed within the same region of the brain. If experiencing the co-morbidity of depression and chronic pain, an effective anti-depressant could then potentially kill two birds with one stone. And who doesn’t want to take less medication? Keep in mind, however, prescription medication from your primary care physician or a pain management specialist can help, but aren’t the magic cure all either. So what else is there to consider?

The way you think about your pain – and your depression – can largely impact what you sense you are experiencing. Being optimistic about your treatment and getting better and engaging in counseling can help. Specifically, spending time with a therapist who is well-versed in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), can help you achieve this change in mindset toward the positive. Learning to reframe your experience can change how you feel and how you subsequently choose to respond. It goes a little something like this: your thinking promotes a certain feeling, which leads you toward a particular behavior. A good therapist can also teach you some healthy coping methods or skills, and get you connected with some helpful mindfulness-based stress-reduction activities.